Oakley's Tastes

Just heard in the Martin house...

Jenn: Do y'all want anything at the grocery store?

silence

Oakley: Bacon.

No argument here, my girl.

"How do the lambs know what time it is?"

Lindy asked me that this weekend. We were sitting at lunch, eating gyros, with the Hickmans and the Watsons. I looked around the restaurant, trying to figure out what the heck she was talking about.

Do you know?


Would it help you if I said, "Pa rum pum pum pum"?


I think Tim Hickman was the one to figure it out. We spent much of the meal from that point forward trying to figure out how an ox or a lamb might keep time... Foot tapping? Does a cloven hoof make it difficult to snap?

Amalgam

Clearly my daughters are an amalgam of their mother (a foodie) and father (a hockey fan). Tonight's indication came on the car ride home from our first basketball practice of the year.

Aspen: Did the Predators win their last game?
Tim: Yes, I think it was 1 - 0.
Aspen: Who was the goalie?
Tim: Pekka Rinne.
Aspen: [after a pause] How old is pecorino?

Thanksgiving Artwork

20081203-90-17608.jpg, originally uploaded by flamingobear.

Occasionally I remember to photograph or scan some of the kids' artwork for display here on the blog. This Thanksgiving's lucky winner is a poster created by Oakley. Stapled to the back was this (written totally by Oakley, spelling as written by Oakley):

My name is Oakley. We are pilgrims. We came to the new world on the Mayflower. It was a very long and very hard jorney. There was not very much room on the Mayflower. A lot of my freinds died. Then someone shoutded land ho! I was so excited. Oakley.

Kisses

I just put Oakley down for a rest. As I do with each of the girls, I give them a kiss on the cheek when I put them down. Oakley, a couple of times of late, has decided to move her lips so they get the kiss. As I walked away, she said, "Is it still a kiss if it's not on the lips?"

My reply, "Yeah, it's just a different kind of kiss."

Oakley's parting words, "There are hundreds of different ways to kiss."

My parting thought, "Uh-oh."

The Santa Train

We were having a nice breakfast here in Kingsport. Grammie and Lindy had put together the traditional items, toast, grits, bacon, and of course, eggs. I mentioned that when we have eggs at home, we often have a dozen among us.

Grandpa decided to test the girls.

Grandpa: Aspen, do you know how many there are in a dozen?
Aspen (and Oakley): Twelve.
Grandpa: And how many in a baker's dozen.
Aspen (and Oakley): Thirteen!

a few moments passed, clearly long enough for a subject change...

Grandpa: Do you all know what the Santa Train is?
Oakley: 14!?

Sniffles

Lindy's been a little under the weather. Yesterday, she said this to Jenn.

"I have the sniffles. And the coughles (koff uhls)."

Uh oh

Today is Lindy's third "birthday party" with a few friends, and we were just getting ready. Partly to entertain her, we had Lindy up on the counter with us. We do this pretty regularly when we're cooking. I had just finished grating some cheese, and Lindy was sitting next to the salt cellar. I looked over, and she'd opened it, grabbed a pinch, and put it in her mouth.

Tim: Lindy, what are you doing?.
Lindy: Eating salt.
Tim: We don't eat salt by itself.
Lindy: Why?
Tim: It's not good for you.
Lindy: Why not?
Tim and Jenn: [together, see, we're on the same page, ready for stuff like this] It'll give you high blood pressure.
Lindy: [without missing a beat] I like to get high.
Tim: [thinking] Um, yeah, uh, well, I guess I could just go put it on the blog...

Aspen's Been Selected

I think this is really cool. Aspen gets to do something very special tomorrow. Basically, all the kids in second and third grades (and others?) were asked to write their feelings about peace. They did so, and turned them in. The school principal, Mrs. Contich, then selected 5 to be read.

You guessed it, Aspen's was selected, and she'll be reading it with the school chorus tomorrow as they place their pinwheels for peace near the flagpole. Her text follows:

I think that peace would come to the world if all people were allowed to voice their opinion and are free to work and play and live where they want because peace is good for the world.

How cool is that!?

Silly Daddy

I was putting Lindy down for bed tonight. I set her in the crib, and grabbed her pillow for her. (It's actually a stuffed shirt, but that's a story for another time.)

So, I laid it out, upside down as it turns out.

Lindy: Silly freakin' Daddy, that's not how it goes.
Tim: What?!
Lindy: Silly freakin' Daddy.
Tim: Uh, Lindy, we don't use that word.
Lindy: I just like you.

Venice = Vince

So, I was chatting with my sister Jenni tonight when she mentioned that Kiana's favorite city from our Italian voyage had been Venice. So, I thought I'd ask the girls about it tonight. We started with Lindy, and we were trying to help her remember the name of the city with the canals.

Tim: It sounds like Veh.
Lindy: I don't know.
Aspen: [for some reason thinking that spelling it would help Lindy] V - I - N - C - E.

I just laughed. Then I spelled back to Aspen what she had spelled. We established that was Papa's name, and we moved on. But I still think it's pretty funny.

Lindy and her words...

Lindy is really awfully well spoken for a two year old. That's why I can post funny things like this from tonight as we were getting ready for bed.

Lindy: Daddy, there's a stranger.
Tim: Where?
Lindy: In the hall.
Tim: Who is it?
Lindy: It's Daddy.
Tim: Lindy, a stranger is someone you don't know.
Lindy: [emphatically] Like deers are strangers.

Today's Sign That My Daughters Love Me

Yup, it's self indulgent to share these moments, but it is the prerogative of the author...

So, we were at a soccer store, getting cleats for the girls' upcoming soccer seasons. I've been wanting a US Soccer Team jersey to wear during the Olympics, etc. I was trying them on and coming out to see what the girls and Jenn thought of them. Jenn was talking with one of the high school age guys working in the store with Oakley nearby when I came out.

When Oakley saw me, she said to Jenn and the guy...

"Now, that is a man."

"Mommy & Daddy can!"

So, I was saying good night to the two older girls just now. It started with Oakley...

Oakley: Daddy, I was just going to ask...
Aspen: [preempting Oakley] This headboard is getting annoying.
Tim: Just move your pillow down, it won't bump it.
Aspen: OK.
Oakley: I said to Aspen, "I wish you could sleep in my bed." And she said, "I wish I could, too."
Aspen: No, I didn't.
Oakley: Yes, you did.
Tim: You wish you could snuggle with Oakley, Aspen?
Aspen: Yes.
Tim: Well, that's sweet. It wouldn't be good for sleeping though, OK?
Aspen: OK.
Tim: In Italy, though, I'm sure there will be nights where you guys share a bed, so you can snuggle then.
Aspen: OK.
Oakley: Are we going to have bunk beds?
Tim: Yes.
Aspen: I wish we could have them for more than one night.
Tim: Why, so both of you can sleep on top?
Aspen: Yes.
Tim: We will.
Oakley: Yes!
Aspen: How many nights will we have them?
Tim: Three.
Oakley: Who will get to sleep there the third night?
Tim: I don't know, we'll see.
Oakley: Mommy & Daddy can!

Bacon

In case you missed it on my twitter stuff, this was Aspen's quote last night eating dinner...

"Bacon is so good to me, it's like dessert."

Papa would be so proud.

"I said it"

A few months ago, Aspen came home sporting some new jokes learned at school.

Aspen: What's your name?
Tim: Daddy.
How do you spell it?
Tim: D - A - D - D - Y.
Aspen: I said, "It." I - T.

Well, Lindy brought her own flavor to it today.

Lindy: How do you spell your name?
Tim: D - A - D - D - Y.
Lindy: What's your name?
Tim: Daddy.
Lindy: I said, "It".

Update: Just now, I overheard Oakley and Lindy playing "Babies", where Lindy is a baby, and Oakley is the mom.

Oakley: What's your name?
Lindy: It.

"I was just offering."

Tonight, we had dinner on the screened porch, and had recently finished. Aspen and Lindy were wrestling on the floor inside, and Oakley was finishing up her strawberries. (Yes, we finished the 16 quarts from last week, and yes, Jenn bought five more this week.)

Oakley stood up to go inside, and started to hand her plate to Jenn.

Jenn: You can take your plate in.
Oakley: Do you want me to take your stuff in?
Jenn: You can if you want to.
Oakley: No thanks, I was just offering.

What does ____ drink?

(A quick family related post for all of you who are wondering why this blog has been all about Tim lately.)

So, Lindy often asks about what things drink when we're at dinner. I believe this is an effort to get out of drinking her cup of water. It doesn't work. The conversation below is not verbatim. It's a collection of her thoughts and our responses from the various meals.

Lindy: Do rabbits drink water?
Tim: Yes.
Lindy: Do they drink juice?
Tim: No, all animals drink only water. They don't have juice.
Lindy: All animals?
Tim: Yes.
Lindy: No, they don't.
Tim: Yes, they do.
Lindy: Ticks don't.
Tim: Touche.

Oakley's Learning Book

Aspen wrote this for Oakley. Everything is exactly as written (except I can't get the slanting text to work here on the website).

Oakley's Learning Book.

How To Write. To Write a story you need a beging sentence to intorduce your story. After you write your beging sentence intorduce the characters in your story. Then begin your story. For example,

This is a story about caring. The characters in the story are Oakley and Lindy. Well this is how the story began. They loved each other very much. One day they went... Tell the rest of your story.

Lindy's ABC's

This video is not here because the ABC's are accurate.





Lindy's ABC's from Tim Martin on Vimeo.

I have to admit, I was not ready for this question...

We were upstairs helping the girls get ready for bed.

Oakley: How do babies get in mommies' tummies?
Tim: ______ [shifty glance at Jenn, look at floor]
Jenn: Well, Oakley... a man and woman... a husband and a wife... a husband gives a wife a seed, and it grows in the wife's tummy.

[a moment passes]

Oakley: How does he give her the seed?
Tim: ______ [Very busy with, um, anything, please? Anything at all? Yes, Aspen's fingernails were very long, and they required great focus.]
Jenn: The husband and wife lie very close together.
Oakley: How does he give it to her?
Jenn: Whoa, Oakley, we didn't finish brushing your teeth!

Let me just say, I am awfully proud of my wife's answer. It would have been easy pickings to say, "God puts the baby in the mommy's tummy," or some contrivance about a stork, but she did not. She faced it head on, and I liked that.

And if Aspen's fingernails hadn't been so dangerous, I'm sure that I would have been right in there with the answer. Without a doubt.

Stories from...

Jenn... See, I haven't gotten Jenn to blog herself yet, so you get stories that I hear.

Jenn was making dinner with Aspen tonight, and Aspen's getting old enough where she can actually put stuff in a hot pot. Jenn reminded her not to touch the pot, because it was very hot and she could be burned. Aspen's response:

I won't, Mommy. I'm not like you.

Later, Jenn was playing with Lindy. Lindy decided to scan her.

Jenn: Lindy, how much do I cost?
Lindy: Two dollars.

Lindy then scanned herself.

Jenn: Lindy, how much do you cost?
Lindy: Too much.

Baking Accident

OK, we really enjoy reading Into the Woods around here (and singing it, occasionally). One funny line from it goes like this...

"Because the Baker had lost his mother and father in a baking accident --
or so he believed..."

Well, ours was nothing that severe. Lindy and I often bake some cookies together on Wednesday nights while the others are at church.

Tim: Lindy, I need you to add three scoops [tablespoons] of salt.
Lindy: [scooping] One.
Oven: Beep, beep. [Jenn had left some bread in the oven. I know, it is a lot of baking.]

[I closed the salt cellar and turned around to get the bread out. As I was removing it from the pans, I heard the salt cellar close.]

Tim: Lindy, did you put in more salt.
Lindy: Yes.
Tim: How much did you put in?
Lindy: Two.
Tim: Two more scoops? [Which would have been the right amount.]
Lindy: [blank stare]
Tim: Lindy, tell me exactly how much more you put in.
Lindy: Four inches.
Tim: Thanks, Lindy. I'm gonna do the baking soda myself, OK?

"Do you think they are?"

So I took Aspen and Oakley to the Predators' playoff game tonight. Rather than share stories about hockey (the Preds are far more resilient than I give them credit for), I will share a funny moment from early in the game.

Aspen: Daddy? Why are the cheerleaders' shirts so short?
[They wear crop tops, where the the entire midruff is bared.]
Tim: Well, they think they look cute.
Aspen: Well, do they? Look cute?
Tim: Well, Aspen, what do you think?
Aspen: I don't know.

Euphemism

So I was waiting at a jewelry store with the girls today (as I do every weekend, right?)

A woman walked in with a serpent bracelet. It wrapped around her arm two times and had a head that pointed toward her hand. She mentioned to the woman in the store that a red bead had fallen off, and she was seeking a replacement.

Oakley: What's she doing? What does she need?
Tim: Well, she doesn't want to have a one-eyed snake.

It is at this moment that I realize the euphemistic nature of my prior statement. Whether the woman did or did not, she went on to say...

Woman: I wouldn't want anyone to get the wrong idea.

[Moments later]

Oakley: Daddy, what's a "one-eyed snake"?
Tim: Well, Oakley, it's a snake with one eye.

Somehow, I suspect I am not the only one relating this story tonight...

Sitty

Jenn has my car today because I took hers in for 30,000 mile service. That means that the kids get to experience some different music than normal. As I'm sure you all know, I'm pretty hardcore. At this moment, I'm kicking some, well, ok, I have showtunes in my CD player right now. Jenn and I went to see Rent last Friday at TPAC, and so I had been listening to it lately.

So, this is the scene in the car on the way to day school today:

Angel (Rent): New York City.
Collins (Rent): Uh huh.
Angel (Rent): Center of the universe.
Collins (Rent): Sing it, girl.
Angel (Rent): Times are shitty, but I'm pretty sure they can't get worse.
Lindy: puzzled expression I don't know what sitty means.
Jenn: pushes skip button quickly
Oakley: No, Lindy, it's shitty.
Jenn: Sometimes people use words we just shouldn't use.

We have no indication of whether Oakley knows what shitty means...

Kiana's an Astronaut?

So, we're continuing to read many of the Magic Tree House books that we started prior to Christmas. They were the inspiration for our tree house and often lead to questions. Tonight, we read a chapter from Midnight On The Moon.

Aspen: Daddy, how big is the moon.
Tim: It's big honey... smaller than the earth, but still huge.
Oakley: Is it bigger than me.
Tim: Yeah.
Aspen: It's bigger than our house.
Tim: It's bigger than Tennessee at least.
Oakley: Is it bigger than Pennsylvania?
Tim: Yes.
Aspen: Is it bigger than China?
Tim: Well, that's a country, not a state, but yes. It's probably about that size.
Oakley: So Kiana's an astronaut?

Seriously, that was the leap of logic. Pretty impressive, I say. I mean, I can sort of see how she got there, but it is a pretty funny leap. And no, Kiana (our niece/cousin who was born in China) is not an astronaut, at least not yet. Although a little bird told me that she has started reading the Magic Tree House books with her mom, so we'll see what happens when she reaches book 8.

For those of you wondering (I just did the "research"), the moon's size, in comparison to the earth is as follows:

7.4% of the Earth's surface area
2.0% of the Earth's volume
1.23% of the Earth's mass

Lorice

Aspen: Daddy, what's "lorice" mean?
Tim: Huh?
Aspen: What does "lorice" mean, like on the CD?
Tim: Lorice isn't a word, honey.
Aspen: Like in the song, "....and a thousand churches, 'lorice'"


I'll leave it at that until someone accurately names the song (or words) in the comments...

Aspen's Pajamas

After tonight's bath, Aspen said, in describing the pajamas she'd selected, "Daddy... I chose these pajamas on purpose. Pants, so that we could keep having bad weather and miss more school, short sleeves, so that we could get some flowers going."

Self Esteem

Is there any better self esteem builder than your youngest daughter insisting that she bring Raggedy Ann into the bathroom when you need to use the potty, and then having Raggedy Ann clap for you after you do so? As Lindy said, "Raggedy Ann is excited."

There's no doubt... I am the man.

"I do like ducks."

Smoothies are often a part of our weekend breakfasts. Today was no exception. We had smoothies, "eggies", and some banana bread that Jenn makes. (Editor's note: The banana bread is perfect, even though Jenn continues to try to find ways to make it better.)

Aspen and Oakley set the table, and we sat down to eat. Lindy looked at her spoon (a metal one) and the following conversation ensued.

Lindy: Why do I have this spoon?
Jenn: To be like us.
Lindy (after a pause): I do like ducks.

Which song?

Before dinner, we often sing a song.

Tim: Lindy, what do you want to sing tonight?
Lindy: Apple Johnnyseed

"These"

We were playing basketball, and Lindy had a misstep and fell on her face, knees, etc... We came inside, and she cried.

Lindy: (crying) My knee still hurts.
Tim: Which one?
Lindy: These

Funny Stuff

Tonight, after dinner, I decided to give the girls a bath early, and then play a game with them afterward. It worked out pretty well, because they did some funny stuff. After the game of Monopoly Junior (a Christmas gift to Oakley), we decided to read. Oakley had read The White Stallion to herself today (seriously), and she wanted to read it to us.

At dinner, she kept talking about Anna and "Grinch" as if they were both girls. I thought it a little odd that Grinch was a girl, but didn't worry about it. We got to learn that Grinch was actually spelled Gretchen.

As she was reading to us, Oakley ran right through another word, stating that the "Must-ej" did something. She missed the work mustang in this case, but I'm just amazed by Oakley's reading all the time. She really has no comprehension of phonics at all... she simply pays attention to words she's learned and the context of those words. Things like Gretchen and Mustang don't occur to her as wrong because they are words outside of the norm. She's not bothered, and neither am I.

Incidentally, this is one place where not watching TV really seems to pay off for us. I'm certain it plays a role in how well Aspen reads, and that spills over like crazy. Oakley has learned to read simply by watching Aspen and wanting to. As Oakley was reading, Lindy walked over to me with a Magic Treehouse book about buffalo and said, "Two buffaloes. Jack and Annie." I'm pretty sure that Lindy wasn't ready, but she certainly wanted to.

Lastly, Lindy was sporting some new pajamas from Uncle Dougie tonight. She chose them after the bath and was really into the "snow globe pajamas". The decal, like all decals, is kind of scratchy on the outside. She was rubbing it up and down with her fingernails and proceeded to say, "I'm playing my banjo."

"Daddy can make it work"

Santa brought us many neat things... The stockings included slinkies, fun balls, toiletries... a typical haul. Strangely enough, one of the favorite items for the whole family was the whoopie cushion found in Jenn's stocking. Perhaps someday you'll see video of Lindy trying to place her bottom on it accurately.

As whoopie cushions are wont to do, this one ended its own life quickly. The tear in the seam has rendered it useless already. When Aspen discovered it this morning, she brought it Jenn and told her it wasn't working anymore.

Jenn: There's nothing we can do, honey. It's broken.
Aspen: I'll take it Daddy. Daddy can make it work.

My question to you... Do I take pride in the fact that my daughter thinks I can fix things? Or do I read into the fact that my daughter believes that I have a particular talent in the sounds of a whoopie cushion?

Santa

We went to the annual Hickman Santa party last night, pictures, I'm sure, will follow at some point. For now, I can only share this...

Santa: Ah, little girl, what would you like for Christmas?
Lindy: Cheese and crackers.

I love little girls.

Christmas Carols

Aspen was recalling the Christmas Carols they sang this morning at school in assembly.

"We sang Joy to the World, Jingle Bells, and then Jesus led us in singing 'Ah Leet Dah Dee Dah'."

Please use the comments to guess at the actual title...

A "real" dad

I was being goofy this morning. That's nothing new, I suppose. Today, I was claiming that I knew every song ever. I challenged the girls to come up with one I didn't know, and every time, I just sang whatever song they created... with feeling.

Aspen said, "Daddy... I'm getting serious, do you really know every song."

Much like a 1st grader, I mocked Aspen by repeating her. Oakley's response?

"Daddy, act like a real dad."

Advent Calendars

One of the cool traditions we participate in is the opening of Advent calendars from Nana and Papa. Each year, Nana finds a cool card for each of the girls, and they open them each morning.

One of my favorite parts is when they happen upon something that we can't figure out. This year, on the 2nd, Aspen opened something that looked like a bird on a short stick. I still don't know what it really is. But Oakley concluded the following this morning...

"It's lip gloss for Mrs. Claus!"

And the back of the card...

aspen-card-back, originally uploaded by flamingobear.

And here's the back. It is difficult to read, so I'll quote it here for you...

"You are the best daddy ever! I had a lot of fun this year with scooer[sic]! You were the best coach I ever had!

"I really like the bed you made for me and our play set! I love you very much! From Aspen! To daddy! 11-9-07"

Really, I think my daughter is amazing. While she might be prone to overstatement, I think her heart is so awesome to write something like this on her own. I'm awfully proud of my little girl.

Gigolo

As many of you know, I was in an a cappella group in college... The Dodecaphonics. Well, one of our CDs has made it into the rotation in the car. Last night, on the way home from a party, this transpired when the song "Just a Gigolo" came on...

Aspen: What's a gigolo?
Tim: Um...
Jenn: Stares at Tim
Tim: A, uh, dancer who's a man
Oakley: Oh, then Jeremiah (the boy in her dance class) is a gigolo.
Tim: Yeah, well, not really. It's a man dancer. Not a boy dancer.
Oakley: Well, then, if you dance, then you're a gigolo.

Who am I to argue?

"Ask your father"

Yes, that's right. We've had our first major question that was referred to me.

Victoria's Secret sends stuff to our house. On this occasion, it's a gift card, sent to me, celebrating my birthday. To answer your obvious questions, "No, I don't wear anything from VS." And, "No, it's not my birthday."

The card said something to the effect of, "Get something sexy, Angel."

Note for parents of young children: When your children learn to read, you have to pay attention to the things you leave on the counter.

So, Aspen looked at the counter, picked up the card, and said to Jenn, "Mommy, what does sexy mean?"

Jenn deftly slid the card under a pile of other mail and said, "Ask your father."

Well, to this point, Aspen hasn't remembered to ask. Do any of you have thoughts about the right answer to the question?

"Yeah, you did."

Lindy and I are hanging out tonight (Wednesday's are church night for Aspen, Oakley, and Jenn). We spent much of the night outside doing various things including playing, swinging, kicking balls, and chasing bugs.

We finished up and Lindy asked me to carry her in. I picked her up and she told me she wanted her juice.

Tim: Give me a kiss.
Lindy: (Kiss)
Tim: I had fun with you tonight.
Lindy: Yeah, you did.

"Butter?"

So, I had some calm time with Aspen and Lindy today (Oakley and Jenn were at a birthday party). Aspen said she wanted to do something with me, and she wanted to be helpful. I said, "OK, I need to make your lunch pretty soon. Do you want to make your lunch?"

Aspen said she did, and so we were off. We made Lindy's lunch, and then we started on Aspen's.

I was trying to get Aspen to get a plate...

Tim: Aspen, what do you need for any meal?
Aspen: Um.... butter?

She was, well, pretty much right. Papa would be so proud.

Dadouille

Lindy has arrived at her own nickname for me.

Daddy has morphed into "Dadu", as heard in David Wilcox' song, Radio Men...

And recently, Dadu has morphed into Dadu-ee, not to be confused with Andouille.

"Know that..."

Oakley has a stuffed pig (intended for drawing on) that she got for her birthday. For whatever reason, this pig has become important to Lindy. Today, before nap, Lindy wanted to hold it (and the book, and some other stuff).

Jenn: Lindy, isn't that nice of Oakley to share her pig with you?
Lindy: My pig.
Jenn: Lindy, that's Oakley's pig.
Lindy (as if to say, "Duh, Mom"): [I] know that.

Jenn was also telling me that Lindy found my new laptop today. It was sitting on the desk in the office and she walked up to it, and opened it. Well, when it gets opened, the CD drive spins to see if anything is there... Let's just say that when Jenn turned around, Lindy had slammed the laptop closed and started running...

Distinctive

Last night, we had a nice dinner, including some guacamole that Jenn made. As it should, it had a fair amount of garlic in it. Jenn had to leave soon after dinner, and just before she left, she said, "Wow, my breath is bad." This conversation ensued after her departure.

Aspen: Now Mommy is distinctive.
Tim: What?
Aspen: Mommy is distinctive.
Tim: What do you think that means, Aspen?
Aspen: You know, when all the animals die off?
Tim: Um, yeah, that's extinct.

We then proceded to clarify the difference between distinctive, extinct, and stink.

Oakley: When I get made at myself, I say, "I stink."

OK, close enough.